The Value in Journaling
Mid-month Moment: How I used to journal, how I journal today, and why it's good for us.
I started journaling in college to set goals and log pivotal moments in my life. But looking back, I realized that my journals only contained anxious thoughts and problems. One could argue that these are pivotal moments. Anxiety means we care — about a friendship, romantic relationship, job, family, or move. But one aspect of my journaling made my entries terrible — I never followed through on my entries.
Each entry contained plenty of dilemmas and questions, but they all remained as cliffhangers.
Entry #1: I’m not sure which job to take. One is a great learning opportunity in a different city. I’ll learn new perspectives and meet people different than me, but I’m hesitant to uproot from this community I’ve invested into.
Entry #2: Making friends after school is challenging. Is it really supposed to take this long to feel plugged into a community? Is this the reality of growing up? People seem busy with their individual lives rather than fostering relationships. Do I need to be more intentional in building relationships with others?
Entry #3: This job isn’t what I expected. The growth opportunities don’t seem to be as what was originally discussed. And so I think I might begin applying for new jobs. Or perhaps I can wait a little longer.
My entries made my life seem like a perpetual stream of stress and depression with no resolution. Based on my journals, my life would make for one unspectacular movie. My style and habit of journaling needed change.
Adjusting Frequency
Thanks to a friend, I adjusted my journaling habit a few months ago. During my stay in New York, this friend introduced me to a coffee spot he frequents on Saturday mornings. Here he sits down with a coffee and devotes 30 minutes to jot down thoughts from the past week.
I mimicked his routine during my stay, and I brought the habit back home. Instead of letting my circumstances dictate the frequency of my entries, I journal once a week on Saturday mornings. This one adjustment changed everything.
What has been the value?
Though my entries are spaced out weekly, I noticed 2 benefits. First, the mundane has become extraordinary. Second, consistency brought frequent opportunity for recalibration.
(1) From mundane to extraordinary
Before my habit adjustment, my entries only contained anxious dilemmas. The pages were sparse. Some entries were spaced apart by months. Through my journal, my life didn’t seem all that exciting — aside from the stressful dilemmas. But when I began to write consistently, I found a deeper appreciation for the simple things.
My weeks are not extraordinary. Not every week is filled with a life altering experience. Most of the time, things remain the same. But because I dedicated myself to write each week, I found subtle joys. Some weeks required more attention to detail in order to find the blissful moments. Such a small change in habit resulted in a significant shift in perspective.
In addition, my weekly entries provide a full story to any pivotal moments. I can see how circumstances led to the climax of a life altering moment, and I can see the epilogue of that season. My pondering thoughts are documented. The outcome of my decision is recorded. The entries teach me what to do (or not do) the next time a similar situation occurs.
(2) Frequent recalibration
Have you heard stories that left you wondering, “How did this person become this way? What happened to them?” Some are tragic tales while others are fortunate successes. I’ve witnessed a share of both.
A few years ago, I heard that a high school classmate passed away. We weren’t close, but I recognized the name. I remember this person being bright and optimistic. But some series of events must have led to their decision to tragically end their life. On the other hand, I’ve caught up with friends who are better than ever. In the same way, I wondered how this person turned into an upbeat, take on the world kind of personality.
Both ends of the spectrum are a culmination of circumstances and decisions over time. Yes — major events can shake someone’s world. But a series of events can nudge the trajectory of one’s life. It only takes a few significant nudges to affect the outcome of your life years down the road.
Take a bow and arrow for example. Adjusting the angle of your bow a few degrees up or down doesn’t seem like much. But when you release the arrow, you’ll see that the slightest degree of change can significantly affect the outcome when it travels 50, 100, 150 yards out.
What does this anecdote have to do with journaling? Journaling keeps the nudges in check. If small decisions and actions compound into major outcomes, then it’s important to check the small things frequently. Where does this path lead if I continue to make these decisions? Am I going in the right direction — is this true to my beliefs?
Aside from these calibrations, I’m learning to be honest with myself. We all know we shouldn’t lie to anyone. But I often am not honest with myself because I’ve crafted an unfortunate skill to say the right answer — whether that be in the classroom or in my own thoughts. An incorrect, honest answer is a better starting place than a correct, dishonest one. Only when I’m honest with myself, can I begin to assess what changes need to be made — if at all.
How To Get Started
Being honest with ourselves can lead to some surprises. Things may be hiding behind the busy-ness of our minds and lives. I’m confident journaling will lead to more clarity about the questions you have in life. If you want to give it a try (or start again), here are some suggestions.
Pen & Notebook
I write with a pen. Longhand writing demands more attention and intention. If you’ve only tried journaling through typing, then give the pen a try!
As for a notebook, start with something simple and cheap (~$10 and around 50 pages). An expensive notebook will not get us to suddenly write in the same way that buying gym equipment or clothes will get you to workout consistently. Only when we’ve established a habit should we then reward ourselves with nicer quality items to continue our journey.
What to write?
I write as thoughts come to mind. And over the weeks, I’ve noticed a pattern in how I write. Feel free to use this outline as a starting point if you don’t know where to begin. But I encourage you to eventually make your own.
Date / Time / Location
One thought from this past week — feelings about the past week (positive / negative / lessons learned), memorable moments, etc.
One thought about the near future — plans / ambitions / questions
At the top of my entries, I write the date, time, and location. Next, I write unfiltered thoughts about the past week. Most of my content is about work, given the recent busy months. But I also reflect on positive news, tough challenges, or lessons learned during the week. Finally, I shift my focus to the near future. It’s good to look up from time to time. Look up at what’s ahead, and look behind at how far we’ve come.
A mixture of these 3 items has helped me appreciate the mundane weeks while checking the trajectory of my life.
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What I’m Reading:
Currently Reading: Atomic Habits — James Clear
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